Monday, August 23, 2004
Rant of the Day:-
The vaguaries of fate, inexorable and inescapable - and the fact I cant remember anything about Saturday night.
Song Lyric of the Day:-
I've got sweat on my finger tips
And a belly full of beer shits
I don't think too much cos its bad for my Soul
I've got blood in my underwear
I don't know how I got it there
I'm messed up in the head or so I'm told
(Great Drinker, The Wonderstuff)
Gibber of the Day:-
Your going to love this one, vintage Dan.
Made it into work an hour late (again) cos I'd lost my flat keys somewhere in the flat and couldnt find them for 45 minutes, they turned up eventually under the carpet - obviously keeping them there for safety, cidery senility. Oh, the other 15 minutes, I had to finish watching Trisha to find out why some tatooed druggie had slept the grim sister of some 'orrible bint he was married to.
I then recieved an e-mail from the new boy in consultancy in Oxford, full of vitriollic abuse about the boss who had just booted him out of the department. I sent one back mocking that self same power mad agent of happiness deterioration, only to find - that the boss had re-routed all the new boys e-mails to his own computer. Excellent, I only know cos I recieved an out-of-office reply from the laughing boy. The IT boys at Oxford cant remove it, so the boss has got a happy homecoming message from me on his computer when he returns from holiday on monday.
Then it all went boobs up at the office - and not in a good way.
Cheers
More stories of self-enduced redundancies later.
Dan
The vaguaries of fate, inexorable and inescapable - and the fact I cant remember anything about Saturday night.
Song Lyric of the Day:-
I've got sweat on my finger tips
And a belly full of beer shits
I don't think too much cos its bad for my Soul
I've got blood in my underwear
I don't know how I got it there
I'm messed up in the head or so I'm told
(Great Drinker, The Wonderstuff)
Gibber of the Day:-
Your going to love this one, vintage Dan.
Made it into work an hour late (again) cos I'd lost my flat keys somewhere in the flat and couldnt find them for 45 minutes, they turned up eventually under the carpet - obviously keeping them there for safety, cidery senility. Oh, the other 15 minutes, I had to finish watching Trisha to find out why some tatooed druggie had slept the grim sister of some 'orrible bint he was married to.
I then recieved an e-mail from the new boy in consultancy in Oxford, full of vitriollic abuse about the boss who had just booted him out of the department. I sent one back mocking that self same power mad agent of happiness deterioration, only to find - that the boss had re-routed all the new boys e-mails to his own computer. Excellent, I only know cos I recieved an out-of-office reply from the laughing boy. The IT boys at Oxford cant remove it, so the boss has got a happy homecoming message from me on his computer when he returns from holiday on monday.
Then it all went boobs up at the office - and not in a good way.
Cheers
More stories of self-enduced redundancies later.
Dan
Wednesday, August 18, 2004
Rant of the Day:-
1) Why do able bodied, fit and healthy people need to have suitcases on wheels. Surely these devices, designed for the elderly in the 1960's to be covered in Tartan and to carry shopping, have found a more demonic role in life.....yes boys and girls, their function is now to trip people over, people who are walking over 4ft away from the device carrier! Everywhere you go these days there appear to be hoards of unknowing would-be assassins, dragging round suitcase shaped trip wires. AND when you fall over on your face, after knee level collisions with the clothing filled bastards, the device carrier stares at you like its all your fault in a ' you could have damaged my suitcase' styley.
Top tip, creep up behind said device, slow down to the speed of the device carrier, and in one fluid motion slip your foot under one corner and flip the beast onto its back. Now watch noncahlantly from a street corner, as the evil luggage spins its wheels helplessly in the air until it it is squashed by a passing bus. HAHAHAHAHA.
Song Lyric of the Day:-
In the middle of a good time
Truth gave me her icy kiss
Look around you must be joking
All that way, all that way for this.
(The Oyster Band)
Gibber of the Day:-
Sorry, no time for gibber today, but random musing will be resumed once the fault is corrected (when I've one the lottery and dont need to work).
Love and hugs
Dan
Oh, cursed be the whisky that made me so frisky.
1) Why do able bodied, fit and healthy people need to have suitcases on wheels. Surely these devices, designed for the elderly in the 1960's to be covered in Tartan and to carry shopping, have found a more demonic role in life.....yes boys and girls, their function is now to trip people over, people who are walking over 4ft away from the device carrier! Everywhere you go these days there appear to be hoards of unknowing would-be assassins, dragging round suitcase shaped trip wires. AND when you fall over on your face, after knee level collisions with the clothing filled bastards, the device carrier stares at you like its all your fault in a ' you could have damaged my suitcase' styley.
Top tip, creep up behind said device, slow down to the speed of the device carrier, and in one fluid motion slip your foot under one corner and flip the beast onto its back. Now watch noncahlantly from a street corner, as the evil luggage spins its wheels helplessly in the air until it it is squashed by a passing bus. HAHAHAHAHA.
Song Lyric of the Day:-
In the middle of a good time
Truth gave me her icy kiss
Look around you must be joking
All that way, all that way for this.
(The Oyster Band)
Gibber of the Day:-
Sorry, no time for gibber today, but random musing will be resumed once the fault is corrected (when I've one the lottery and dont need to work).
Love and hugs
Dan
Oh, cursed be the whisky that made me so frisky.
Thursday, August 05, 2004
Rant of the Day:-
Please dont think me selfish, but its me again I'm afraid. Sorry about that everyone.
Song Lyric of the Day:-
Here am I a free man, with nothing in the coffers
I’m open to offers and I’m in my prime
I’m to young to marry, but still to old to mess around,
Let me be your carry-out at closing time.
Two noses shinning, Happiness is doubled,
It hits you like the stubble in a whisky Kiss
God Bless the bouncers, and happy hour romancers,
You’ve got to take your chances in a life like this.
Gibber of the Day:-
Its too hot, I'm to fat, its arf 8 and i'm still at work
nuff said.
Love and hugs to all
Dan
Please dont think me selfish, but its me again I'm afraid. Sorry about that everyone.
Song Lyric of the Day:-
Here am I a free man, with nothing in the coffers
I’m open to offers and I’m in my prime
I’m to young to marry, but still to old to mess around,
Let me be your carry-out at closing time.
Two noses shinning, Happiness is doubled,
It hits you like the stubble in a whisky Kiss
God Bless the bouncers, and happy hour romancers,
You’ve got to take your chances in a life like this.
Gibber of the Day:-
Its too hot, I'm to fat, its arf 8 and i'm still at work
nuff said.
Love and hugs to all
Dan
